


Of Bad Rhymes and Valentines

by BoredBeingRegular



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bad Pick-Up Lines, Derek Hale Being an Idiot, Fluff, Fluff and more fluff, M/M, Stiles is hopeless, Valentine's Day Fluff, it's bad I know, they rhyme, yeah - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-20 22:56:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6028576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BoredBeingRegular/pseuds/BoredBeingRegular
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles offers up his rose with a grin and says, “It sure would make my day if you would be my bae.” Derek just stares at him, scowl not budging an inch. Stiles stares back and wiggles a seductive eyebrow at him. They stay that way for a sense moment.</p>
<p>And then Derek shuts the door in his face.</p>
<p>****</p>
<p>Or, in which Stiles tries to woo Derek with really really bad rhyming pickup lines.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Bad Rhymes and Valentines

**Author's Note:**

> Whoops I missed Valentines day. I blame it on being single *wink*.
> 
> Actually, I wrote this fic last summer for my cousin who wanted a fic where stiles seduces Derek with really bad rhyming pickup lines and I've been waiting half a year to post it.

Stiles, for the most part, has always loved holidays. Loved watching the ball drop on new years, and the fireworks in 4th of July. Loves the free pancakes at IHOP on Pancake day. Loves running around on easter looking for plastic eggs. Christmas and his birthday were also among his favorites (shut up, his birthday is totally a holiday). He loves Holidays. But despite this, he’s never been big on Valentine's day.

This is probably because of the fact that he’s never had anyone to be his valentine. 

Not a real one anyways. When he was a kid, he used to make his mom valentines. He’d cut out lopsided paper hearts and scribble “I love you” in crooked and unpracticed toddler handwriting. Stiles would give it to her and she would smile and hand him his own valentine with candy taped to it....

Off topic, the point is, he’s never had a romantic valentine. There were the ones previous years where him and Scott would trade boxes of chocolate with “Be my Broentine” (It’s totally a thing, what are you talking about?) written in black sharpie on the box. That was more of an excuse to get chocolate than anything else.

But this year, Stiles doesn’t think that’s going to happen. No, this year, his life was flipped upside down when Scott got bitten by a werewolf. 

Yes, New Scott who’s new goal in life was dealing with his ginormous crush on Allison. He’s probably too busy courting her with flowers and love songs to give Stiles bro chocolates this year.

In fact, Stiles thinks everyone he knows has a someone except him. Like the world decided to shove them all around stiles just to point out his extreme singleness. Lydia and Jackson, Boyd and Erica, Scott and Allison. Even Danny and Isaac found dates. 

Okay, he lied, not everyone. There is still Derek Hale. A very attractive, very single Derek Hale. 

Stupidly gorgeous Derek Hale who Stiles has had a crush on since that day in the woods. I mean, you can’t really blame him, have you seen his abs? 

On second thought, maybe the universe is actually pointing out Stiles’ _ and  _ Derek’s singleness together. Maybe it’s a sign. Stiles is going to take it as a sign. Because Stiles needs an excuse to do something really stupid.

And thus began operation Sourwolf.

***

It starts with a rose.

Stiles buys a rose at the local grocery store and drives himself to Derek’s house two weeks before Valentine’s day, all the way there, ignoring the little voice in his head that says ‘this is stupid’.

“Shut up, no it’s not.”

Anyways, Stiles goes knocks on Derek’s door, the one he finished rebuilding last year. Derek opens it to reveal his resting bitch face.

Stiles offers up his rose with a grin and says, “It sure would make my day if you would be my bae.” Derek just stares at him, scowl not budging an inch. Stiles stares back and wiggles a seductive eyebrow at him. They stay that way for a sense moment.

And then Derek shuts the door in his face.

To Stiles’ credit, he just sighs and sort of trudges back to his Jeep. It’s ok, he’s got this. He’s dealt with Lydia’s rejection for years. This? Is nothing. He just has to keep trying.

***

Stiles buys a heart shaped box of chocolates. 

Two days later, when Derek goes to pick up Isaac from school, just before they leave, Stiles comes over with his heart chocolates. “I swear it’ll be fun if you let me call you hon.” he says sweetly.

Derek doesn’t even blink an eye, he just grunts a quick “No” before closing the door to the camaro. Isaac looks over sympathetically before climbing in after. 

Derek drives away, leaving Stiles standing in the middle of the school parking lot.

And if Stiles eats every one of those chocolates in bed that night. Well, no one’s there to see.

***

Of course, Stiles isn’t one to give up. No, he’ll keep going.

So, at the next pack training session, Stiles is totally prepared. 

Usually during training, Stiles just sits on the side and just does his homework or play solitaire on his laptop. This time it no different. Except that Stiles pays a little more attention to what’s going on.

Hehe, lots of shirtless Derek.

The first chance he gets, when all the betas are all sparring and Derek finally steps away, Stiles pulls out a teddy bear from his backpack. Stiles shoves the bear in Derek’s face.

“I can see right through your snarling, so won’t you please be mine, darling?”

Derek doesn’t say anything. Across the field, Scott’s cracking up, and Jackson takes advantage of the moment to punch him in the face.

Derek bypasses Stiles to go get water or something. But as he's walking away, Stiles swears that the corner of his lip twitches upwards.

Stiles counts that as a win.

Which leads to him standing in Derek's front yard with a boombox raised above his head blasting Taylor Swift at the open window.

"BABY CAN'T YOU SEEEEE, YOU BELONG WITH MEEEEEE!" He sings at the top of his lungs.

Derek looks out the window at Stiles and rolls his eyes. But he's  _ smirking _ as he closes the window. Full on  _ smirking _ . Stiles thinks his heart has stopped, just for a second.

A couple mornings later, Derek walks out of his house to find Stiles sitting on the hood of his car, laying on his side as he model poses across the front of the camero. To his side sits a giant teddy bear that looks twice stiles size and tied to it is a bunch of red heart balloons.

"It kills me that we’re apart, because you’ve stolen my heart." Stiles says dramatically, one hand grasping his chest as he does.

"Stiles get off my car, you'll scratch it." Derek responds, however any threatening implication is lost because of the smile on his face. 

Stiles did get off of the car but as Derek was getting in, Stiles leaned in, “You’ll crack eventually, just wait.” 

If Derek was worried, he didn’t show it.

***

Stiles had been plotting. He spent way more time and money on this then he probably should have but, whatever. This was totally going to be worth it....Or, so he hoped. First, he had to figure out how to break into Derek’s house. 

To do this, he enlists the help of the entire pack.

The day before Valentine’s day, everything’s set into motion. Erica texts him at 4.

_ He just left. You have 3 hours _

Stiles takes a moment to put on something decent and then begins to stuffs all of his supplies in the Jeep.

He barely gets the passenger door closed, he has to put all of his bodyweight on the thing to get it to shut. And even then, he only got it to click once so the car is still blinking at him, telling stiles that the door is open. He also may have broke a  _ few _ speeding laws getting to Derek’s house. 

Stiles parks his Jeep in front and uses the spare key Isaac to let himself into the house. No one’s at the house to help him and it takes several trips to his car to get everything inside. Stiles pulls the giant teddy bear (he’s named Stuffles) from the passenger's seat. Then the 2 full trashbags of rose petals. Then approximately 500 grocery bags. (yes, that’s accurate) 

He’s got 2 and a half hours left. Time to get to work.

***

Stiles finishes putting the very last of the cookies out when he get a text from Boyd.

_ he’s coming back. Hope you’re ready _

***

When Derek gets back, the sun has set and the last of it’s orange hues are fading from the sky. He opens the front door and is hit with the overpowering smell of roses. 

“Stiles?” Derek calls. He walks through the dark halls, “why does everything smell like flowers?” The house is softly lit by small, fake, electric candles. On the floor, rose petals are scattered everywhere. Sparsely covering the couch, the coffee table, the rug. Through the living room, a path of red leads to the kitchen.

Derek rounds the corner and finds Stiles standing behind the island counter. The surface is completely covered in red except for the rows of electric candles that bathed in a soft, orange glow, and the plates set in the middle, holding a variety of heart shaped cookies. To the side of the counter, the giant bear from before sat on a stool along with dozens of red balloons tied to either end. Across the cabinets are strings of plastic hearts.

Stiles smiles at Derek from where he stands.

“I’m running out of rhymes, please just be my valentine.” Stiles pleads. He looks at Derek expectantly for a reaction.

But Derek just stares. His eyes filter through the whole room, mouth slightly agape as he takes in everything. Scanning the room and examining every detail. 

Then he laughs. He laughs and laughs and doesn’t stop laughing, body tipping forward slightly with the force.

Stiles shifts in his place uncertain as he watches Derek. It isn’t until Stiles sees him lift a hand up to wipe his face.

“Derek, are you... crying?” Stiles makes his way over.

Derek shakes his head but he continues to palm at his eyes and laugh.

Stiles opens his mouth to say something but he doesn’t get the chance because Derek pulls him in and suddenly they’re  _ kissing _ . Derek’s lips are on his and Stiles tenses for a moment because Derek’s  _ lips  _ are on  _ his.  _ And they’re softer than he expected and they’re perfectly slotted together and  _ oh god _ . Stiles sinks into the feeling, wrapping his arms around Derek and Derek pulls him impossibly closer. Their lips move against each other and the kiss is sweet and chaste but it feels _ perfect _ . And Stiles is  _ drowning _ in the feeling.

They break away and Stiles is completely flush. They’re both heaving slightly, breathing hot air in each other’s faces before Derek tucks his head into the crook of Stiles neck. 

“I’m taking that as a yes.” Stiles finally croaks, his voice, quiet and a bit rough.

Derek chuckles from where his head rests on Stiles shoulder. “You’re such and idiot.” he tells the space under Stiles’ ear.

***

They spend Valentine’s day together getting fat off of Stiles cookies.

(“You know rhymes and valentine don’t actually rhyme, Stiles.”

“Shut up Sourwolf.”)

  
Fin


End file.
